Inconsistency
by DeceptionConsidered
Summary: Edward is adopted by Bella Swan's parents. When there's noone left but them, they have to learn to be together without letting their instincts get the better of them... right?
1. Travelling

**_Second story. again, named after a random word I saw in my brother's room._**

**_READ THIS - flashbacks in my stories will not be announced, it destroys the entire flow of a story and I hate it. you wouldn't write Hatemail to Smeyer coz she didn't write flashback in fuck off huge writing in the middle of her novels._**

**_I'm English, british, so I will get things wrong concerning American places and traditions and holidays etc. don't judge._**

**_I only write if you like it. There's no point writing things people don't enjoy. so review. let me know if it's worth it._**

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Chapter 1 – Travelling

**Bella Swan**

Can I handle this? I think so.

Yeah, I can definitely handle this.

Christ. I don't think I can handle this.

I looked out the window at the clouds we were completely immersed in and felt my eyelids begin to grow in weight as I leant my head back on the 'rest. I wasn't so much worried about going to New York, more nervous about seeing him again.

I'd seen him just weeks ago when he attended the funeral and, if i'm honest, my own inappropriate thoughts made me want to cry, especially as I was thinking them at what was essentially the funeral of my last known family member.

I heard some useless little woman trot down the aisle towards me and offer me an alcoholic beverage. _Yeah I'm 16 you washed up old trout_. I looked up at her and smiled, replying with a polite "No thank you."

The rest of the flight was spent pep-talking myself into complete oblivion. There were so many reasons why I was attracted to him now, in all honesty I'd always been atrracted to him, everyone was. The man could turn nazis to flaming queens. He'd thrust himself into my life at age 9 just having to be cute enough to draw in my mother's attention when he was 13.

I won't disagree the boy is beautiful.

He was from the beginning...

"_Honey, we need to speak with you quickly in the Lounge."_

_I was confused, they never spoke to me in such high pitched sugar-sweet tones. At age 9 I was intelligent beyond my years and people often commented on it._

"_What's wrong? Are you getting divorced?" I asked, in a calm and quiet tone. I'd realised that 9 year olds are at the awkward age where being cute doesn't work as well as it used to but you can't pull off 'Whateva!' yet, so instead of temper tantrums I chose reservedness. Quiet maturity and intelligence got me everything I needed so far, not that I needed much._

"_We've talked for a very long time about something we'd like to do, and we've decided we'd like your opinion before we go ahead and change our lives." After I nodded slowly at her she proceeded to tell me "honey, we've decided we'd like to adopt. If you think you'd be able to share your life with another young person we're going to start with the paperwork. What do you think?"_

_I'd just turned nine. Just last week. I looked up into her brown eyes, not as deep as mine or dad's but still a contribution. "If that's what you two want to do then I think it's a good idea. Give someone a nice place to be."_

"_When we do the interviews darling, would you like to come and meet them?"_

"_Mommy, we're not buying a puppy. It's a human." I said, genuinely perplexed by the idea of window shopping for a sibling. My dad laughed and tousled my hair as he got up from the couch opposite me and went into the kitchen._

"_Yes sweetheart we know it's not a puppy. We just thought you'd want to know who we were helping rather than coming home to find a random person here one day."_

"_Yeah I guess that makes sense. Let me know mommmy, I think I want to come."_

_Weeks and weeks went by, I was beginning to think adoption had been one of Renee's phases, that Charlie had talked her out of it and she'd given up on the notion of saving some poor child from a family-less environment._

_However, just days after this occurred to me I was reading when Renee burst through my door._

"_Honey, we got someone! We're going to change someone's life! Isn't this just so great? IT'S AWESOME." Renee has a more juvenile vocabulary than I do._

"_When mom?" I had to ask questions to keep her on topic, she was already planning the conversion of the attic to fit this new child in._

"_Next week darling! It's taken us weeks but we got an interview last week and next week we are asked to attend a tour at the orphanage, foster home... I don't know what they're called nowadays!"_

_So we did. We arrived at the orphanage foster home exactly one week later to be given our tour and begin our window shopping._

_We were shown into a room filled with screeching toddlers, literally filled with these squealing little runtish beings flying around. There was a ball pit and play pen. I left quickly, wandering down the hall to another room. This one filled with girls; each one wearing their hair differently, also squealing. I left quickly. I couldn't help thinking to myself how cliché the place was, there was a different group of children in every room, teenagers, boys, little girls, a room full of people dressed in dark, ripped clothes, whispering and glaring at me as I entered. Every time, I left... quickly!_

_The next room I entered was small, and appeared to have nothing in it at all except three bean bags, a recliner and a book case. I turned to leave and noticed a couch behind the door with a boy sitting at one end with his legs crossed indian style and his nose buried deep in a book. I smiled, it was a new release, I had my own copy in my bag. I pulled it out and placed my bag on the floor and, folding my legs under me on the couch, opened the book to a dog eared page and began to read. _

_He seemed to notice me about three minutes later, he looked up at me like I'd startled him, staring at my book, after an age he brought his gaze slowly to my face. I grinned and the smile on his face spread quickly. _

"_Hello. I'm Bella. I'm window shopping." He grinned and held out his hand._

"_I'm Edward. I'm supposed to impress you." I giggled and he laughed, I can't remember ever giggling. People weren't funny to me except my dad, and he was just a standard dad, he made me laugh when he tickled me and he made me pancakes on Sundays._

"_I just turned nine. I live in Forks and my daddy is a police officer. We're here to get me a sibling."_

"_I just turned thirteen, I live here. It's really loud and crowded, I like books. I spend too much time by myself to be normal and the other kids call me the vampire coz I'm pale."_

_I felt this was going downhill so I joined in the insulting oneself to make him feel better._

"_My mum made me wear frilly socks til I turned 9 and now everyone at school calls me Bo-Peep. I don't have any friends coz my parents say i'm too smart."_

"_My favourite colour changes all the time. I think it's brown today. I love tuna casserole. I like to cook." This made me grin in his face, we were turned to each other now, our books in our laps, leaning towards each other, he looked fascinated by what I might say._

"_I want to learn to cook. I love ravioli. My favourite colour today is green." _

"_I can make ravioli."_

"_Would you like to come to my house?" I asked. _

"_Yeah maybe! Do you have books? I love books." I laughed and said; "we get new books ALL the time, and you can get a library card." His eyes just about burst out of his head as I heard my mom's voice in the hallway._

"_Bella, Bella?!" She burst through the door and turned to leave again, noting the empty room, when her gaze fell on us; the quiet twosome. She glanced between us, taking in my grin and Edward's now shy face, looking to the floor._

_She approached us and held out her hand. "Hello. I'm Renee. What's your name?"_

_Edward wiped his hand on his white button down before holding his palm out, he mumbled the words; "Edward ma'am."_

"_No, you're mistaken, I'm Renee. I don't know any... Ma'am?" he smiled sheepishly and looked up at her._

"_Bella. Are you ready to go?"_

"_Did you find a puppy mom?" I smiled, she looked at me with astonishment, I very rarely made jokes, or smiled come to think of it._

"_Yes honey. I think so."_

Edward came to live with us just weeks after that. He was four years older than me but we became inseparable.

And now here I am, on a 'plane to New York, to move in with my... brother and start a new life.

I can handle this.

**Edward Masen**

We knew this was coming, he'd told me months ago. He'd fought it with dignity and maintained his strong courageous image.

Charlie Swan was dieing.

Renee died last year when she was in an accident, Bella was with her, honestly I don't know how she coped with it.

_Ahh Bella. Beautiful, sweet, reserved, strong Bella._

They'd been driving back home to Charlie when a black pickup ran a red light and hit Renee's side as her and Bella sung the chorus to we Will Rock You by Queen.

When Charlie found out he had cancer earlier this year he fought it. Naturally. But not as much as was possible, he had resigned himself to this, this fate. There was nothing left when Renee died, he did everything for Bella and I. Adored and doted on us. But he let himself deteriorate when the cancer was announced.

And that is how I found myself in an airport in New York, awaiting a useless little woman to take my name and ticket and tell me information I already knew.

"Who's next please?" I walked forward and she looked under her lashes at me. She's blonde. Not my type. "What can I do for _you_?" she asked, fingering her necklace and batting her over made up eyelashes.

"Edward Masen." I said in a flat tone. She giggled, and proceeded to tap her long, plastic nails over the keyboard in front of her. I handed her my ticket and deadpanned.

She cleared her throat, Bella always said my serious face made people nervous, she of course, just found it hilarious.

Charlie and Renee had never asked me to change my name. Just as Carlisle and Esme hadn't. They asked me not to be offended if someone refferred to me as Edward Swan, because some people are just ignorant, and no matter how many times you tell them your name, they will always assume they know best.

"Uhm, gate 59. you're all set."

"Thanks."

The ride there was filled with more useless little women, blondes, redheads, a spunky pinkheaded teenager all wandering down my aisle with overly swaying hips or discreet arm brushes.

Not my types.

But now I'm in Forks, in a cab. I knew where she'd be, she will not be at the church.

I walked through the door and left my duffel bag at the bottom of the stairs, I proceeded to the lounge and just stared at her, she was so beautiful. Her hair was flowing down her back, the dress itself being backless. I allowed my gaze to wander over her milky skin and count the waves in her mahogany locks.

She was sat, indian style on the couch, stilettos on the coffee table in front of her. The room was packed up, except for the furniture. I approached her, she was staring through the french doors opposite the couch and twiddling her thumbs.

I removed my coat, ran a hand through my hair, and put my arm behind her shoulders, my other arm looped through her knees and I pulled her up, I sat back down with her sideways across my lap.

"Bella." I whispered. She seemed to learn of my presence then, she wound her arms around my neck and clung to me, winding her fingers into the hair on the back of my head and giving me goosebumps. I buried my face into her hair and inhaled the scent that is pure Bella. It took a few moments, but they came, the wracking sobs that left her body and shook her tiny fragile frame.

"Everyone! Everything, it's all gone! What am I going to do? I'm sixteen, I'm so lost Edward, I'm so lost!"

"You're going to come and stay with me, we'll be fine Bella. We'll be fine. We have us. I love you Bella." I breathed through my own tears.

"I love you Edward."

We'd always said this to each other, in a family way, I said it to Renee and Charlie too, so I had never thought anything of it.

She cried for a while longer, I'd planned for this, I knew she wouldn't be able to sleep. I knew she'd be up and ready hours and hours before we needed to leave. And I knew she'd sit around and wait for the time to come. I knew Bella.

I waited for her to still and the soft snores to come and then I carried her upstairs, she's as light as a feather, she always has been. I laid her in her bed, and slid off her dress, she'd be upset if she couldn't wear it, she'd made an effort, she was wearing a black bodice beneath it and black stockings with garters and everything. God, she's going to kill me. I am not going to have these thoughts and feelings, -_and erections.-_ For my younger sister.

_She's not your sister though._

You're getting on my nerves.

_Just pointing out the details._

I slid in behind her and buried my face in the nape of her neck. I wrapped my arms around her waist and felt her hands slide down and her fingers entwine themselves with mine, I sighed and inhaled her once more before falling into a blissful sleep.

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Leave a review. Coz we love Bellward(:


	2. Orangey

_Trivia fact #1 about DC - I can't sleep straight in a bed, I have to sleep width ways, or at a weird angle. Tom loves it.  
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_I rewrote this chapter over and over. Let me know what you think._

_Also, I'm not looking but if anyone would like to Beta this story or Surrealism, PM me.  
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_There'll Be a lot of flashbacks._

**_Do you want to read the funeral or not? Review, let me know, it's your decision._**

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_**Chapter 2 - Orangey

**Edward Masen**

I let the familiar scent wash over my entire form before I punished myself by opening my eyes and breaking the embrace. My arms were still around her waist, her back to my chest and my face completely buried in her hair, strawberries and vanilla and something all Bella sauntering through my nostrils and comforting me the way only she could. Her tiny, delicate fingers were tickling my forearms and playing with the auburn hair there.

Tightening my arms and nuzzling the back of her neck I sighed.

"Missed you." I whispered into her hair, trying to discretely pull my erection away from her body.

"We need to get ready. I have to get dressed again."

"Of course you do. How long were we sleeping?"

"Two hours, we have two hours left."

"Why were you ready to go when I got here, then Bella?"

"I had nothing better to do. I can't stop thinking about them, there's nothing for me to do at all. Nothing, I'm just sitting around waiting to officially acknowledge I have no living blood relatives."

"Get dressed, we'll eat and leave. We can get there first."

I removed myself from the bed and went downstairs to retrieve my funeral clothes and go into my old bedroom to change.

By the time I came out Bella was back in the position I found her in when I first arrived here, only now her hair was up in an elegant bun on the back of her head. I approached her and, placing my head on her shoulder and folding my arms across the back of the couch, said;

"Pancake?"

"Nah, I'm alright."

"Bella you're going to eat... so tell me what you want or I will make you gruel."

This was a running joke of ours, when I first moved in with them she used to make me cook for her all the time, being at the home I'd learned to just cook if I wanted anything and Bella would use that to her highest advantage but when she was upset, she'd refuse to eat. These were the times when I'd tell her she had to cheer up or I would cook nothing but gruel forever.

She'd giggle and hug me, and ask me to make her a pancake, or a toastie, or something young and expected, and everything would be fine...

"_No, this is your bedroom, if you decide you'd rather not stay here with us, we can just take you back to the home whenever you want."_

"_Thank you. When is dinner?"_

"_Whenever you want it Champ! Renee here only cooks if she's really in the mood and I am not permitted in the kitchen by US law. So it'll be takeout tonight. Anythin' you're cravin'?"_

"_Uh, I've never had MacDonald's."_

"_MacDonald's it is."_

_I started to unpack everything from my suitcase, I only had the one, I had a few outfits but nothing more important than the books I took everywhere with me, they took pride of place in the centre, wrapped in my clothes so that they weren't damaged. I started to unpack them and place them on the three shelves that were the entire width of the wall, if I could get my hopes up enough to unpack anything, it would be my books._

_I'd lived with many families. After my mother and father had died I was in the home until I was about 4, when the Cullens were the first family to take any interest in me. The "mother" at the home, said this was unusual and that children had more of a chance of being adopted the younger they were. Carlisle and Esme Cullen took me home, they were perfect, adoring and attentive, they doted upon me until I was 10. Then life seemed to learn how to despise me._

_It was my tenth birthday, Esme and I were waiting for Carlisle to bring my cake home, I wasn't supposed to know but I wasn't stupid. I'd asked for it to just be us. They were the only people in the world I had any kind of fondness for; people really didn't understand how a nine-year-old boy could spend his entire life reading books and baking with his adopted mother, parents would talk about me when I wandered into school clutching my classic novels and dragging my feet. Their children assumed I was a boring person because I didn't find it funny that they threw crayons at adults or tipped their pencil sharpenings on each other's heads to make them cry. _

_The phone's shrill tones broke the peaceful silence Esme and I had cocooned ourselves in, she jumped and reached for the handset in its cradle on the wall._

"_Hello? Carlisle, honey is everything okay? The roast is finished, we're just waiting for you sweetie. What? Oh, okay, no that's fine. It's absolutely fine, stop apologising. He won't mind. Yeah, ten minutes. Love you too sweetheart."_

"_How long will Carlisle be?" I asked, I wasn't too fussed about my birthday, I was spending it with my favourite people anyway, so what did it matter what we did?_

"_He's at the side of the road near Forks, we just need to go and pick him up okay? He's run out of gas on the way home, he was too excited to come see you to remember filling up."_

_We got all 'snuggle warm' as Esme called it -it was uncharacteristically cold for a September, even in Forks. The rain was as heavy as usual though- And we headed towards La Push to pick up Carlisle in Esme's bright red Ford. _

_I took in all the scenery in La Push as we drove through the small reservation, Esme humming the entire ride. Reminding me it was my birthday. The smell of nature flooded me as we drove and I absorbed as much of the environment as I could on the way._

_I felt my eyes flutter closed whilst I listened to the steady revs of the engine and imagined the tyres outside as they sped up or slowed down in accordance with Esme's foot on the pedal._

_The door opening and closing to my left alerted me to my surroundings, and I was made aware that Carlisle's car was ahead of us, emergency hazard lights blinking in perfect time at me. I watched Esme in the rear-view mirror when she pulled the gas can from the trunk and ran around to Carlisle to fill up his tank. He beamed at me and waved; I grinned back and mirrored his action. He and Esme exchanged words and she looked up at him, turned her head to me and lit her face with a bright smile. _

_What happened next will be burned in my mind forever._

_I was reaching for the handle to jump out of the car when something caught my eye from the right side mirror, I watched as a Black pickup truck lost control and skidded, surely and positively for the much smaller black car parked just off to the left in front of me. I screamed, knowing I had no impact on the inevitable collision about to occur. The truck hit Esme, covered by Carlisle, who'd seen the truck and curled his body lovingly around his wife's back, his elbows pressed to the Mercedes as he made a feeble attempt to protect the love of his life from imminent pain. The screamed died in my throat as sobs began to push their way through my lips. _

_The driver of the black pickup was slumped forward, as though asleep on his airbag, blood covering his windscreen. Carlisle's body was completely limp, pressed into his wife's back. I could only see their upper halves above the mangled metal of each vehicle. His arm had fallen and now I could see Esme's face, her eyes were wide and her mouth was opening and closing repeatedly._

_Realising she might still be alive I was stunned to silence, I watched as her hand rose from its position pressed into the shattered window of the Mercedes and reached towards the car I was in. She moved her mouth just once more before her hand fell and her eyes lost all life, staring blankly straight into my face._

_After the incident I was taken back to the home, I became more withdrawn than anyone had thought possible, I was basically a hermit before never mind now._

_Several families attempted to adopt me afterwards, apparently I was classed as cute and appealing, with my oddly coloured hair and huge green eyes. Many women believed they could take care of me, discovering however, that after two weeks of sleepless nights and being awoken by my screaming and attempting to flee their properties they'd had quite enough and would try some other way of expanding their families. Other children._

_I learned to sleep as little as possible, getting four hours if I needed it desperately, I couldn't keep the nightmares at bay, but I could keep them forcefully short._

_The first night I stayed at the Swan residence I was exhausted, I found myself actually wanting to sleep, I'd unpacked my things and we'd eaten the MacDonald's. Renee had told me that Bella, the girl I met at the home, was visiting her grandmother, but I could see her tomorrow, and that I should get some rest._

_Revisiting the death of my first adopters was not uncommon but still horrific whilst I slept, I woke screaming and covered in cold sweat. Each time it was something I couldn't do to stop them, I'd lost my voice, they'd left me behind, the door was locked, I just could NOT find a way to reach them before the truck did, every night._

_As I sat in the unfamiliar room attempting to calm my breathing and remove the image of Esme's glassy eyes from my eyelids I noticed the door creak open slightly, I pushed my hand to my face and attempted to curb the sobs leaving my throat, I didn't want to disappoint this family, they seem nice… real._

_The tiny girl that sat with me on the couch two weeks ago snuck into my room, shutting the door gently behind her as if not to wake anyone, had I not been hysterical I may have found it comical._

"_Hey Edward."She said over the sound of my strangled cries. She wandered to my bed and pulled my head to her chest, kneeling on my bed to my right, I released my mouth and wrapped my arms around her, clinging to her pyjamas and muffling my cries against her stomach. I turned my face into the cloth and pulled her closer to me, I couldn't help but notice how good she smelt, like vanilla and something I couldn't place, she was so tiny and delicate and she was here, holding my head and running her fingers through my hair._

"_Shh, you're okay. You're with us now. You can stop dreaming about bad things. I'll hug your bad dreams away if you want? You're going to be my best friend Edward. I'm glad my mommy picked you." She was whispering into my hair, tugging gently and playing with the strands, my breathing slowed and my fingers started to loosen their grip on her Snoopy pyjamas. "Your hair is orangey. But not like ginger. Orangey. I didn't even know you were here yet. Mommy picked me up and said there was a surprise but I fell asleep in the car. I have bad dreams too, I just woke up from one, I was going to read a book but you started yelling so I was going to tell you to shush because daddy has to work early, but then you sounded sad so I came to give you a hug."_

_She was whispering absolute nonsense into my ears, flitting from topic to topic, my hair, her dad, the police force, books. I instantly started to relax, it usually took me at least an hour to be able to breathe normally but this girl just calmed me. She released my hair and laid down on my pillows, my arms still wrapped around her waist. I laid my head on her stomach and waited for her to carry on speaking, it was so insanely relaxing to hear her voice. _

_She didn't disappoint. "Mommy will make breakfast if you're here. She'll try, maybe she'll try pancakes. She shouldn't cook, it's always disappointing and daddy and I end up sneaking cereal anyway. She's really terrible. Honest." I smiled and wiped the last of the tears from my face. I felt her hands return to my hair and exhaled into her pyjama top. "Are you sleepy again now? Goodnight Edward." I curled my fist around her pyjamas again as the idea of sleep rippled through me, but I wasn't nervous to sleep as I usually would be._

_I closed my eyes and concentrated on the tiny gurgles her stomach made under my right ear as I realised her breathing had evened out and she was asleep I let myself fall asleep against her fragile frame, inhaling her smell and smiling slightly._

_I awoke and realised I was still laid across Bella's stomach, judging by the soft snores she was still asleep and I took the time to grin and marvel in the fact that I'd slept and not had to wake up in tears. I heard the slight creak of the door and froze._

"_Oh goodness! Honey, honey come here!!" Renee's whispered shouting pulled Charlie towards the door._

"_Yeah I'd guessed as much, I heard him screaming but when I got up to check Bella told me it was fine, she said; 'go back to bed daddy. Children all have nightmares, he just needs a hug.' Little middle aged woman that she is." I could hear the smile in his voice and hoped that one day he would refer to me with that much adoration and love. _

"_I've never seen her so peaceful, she usually writhes like she's in some amount of pain, she's not even speaking, Charlie!"_

"_I know sweetheart, leave 'em to it eh? If this is their best night's sleep in months then let them have it. You know what that vile woman at the home said; he never sleeps. Let him rest, poor child." And there it was, the love and adoration I asked for just moments ago._

_I heard the door closed and grinned, nuzzling Bella's stomach with my nose and letting myself enjoy my first peaceful sleep in four years._

_And so, my first night with the Swans was a success._

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How cute is Upsetward?_  
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	3. Teddy and Tango

Trivia about DC fact #2 - I wrote this chapter wearing a tank and a pair of heels. Tom loved it lmao.

I decided not to do the funeral. I don't know enough about them and I didn't want to offend by getting things wrong.

We went to a pub for dinner, came fifth in the quiz.

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Chapter 3 – Teddy and Tango

**Edward Masen**

I watched Bella as she stared blankly ahead in the passenger seat of the Volvo. Any minute trace of makeup she may have had on was wiped off an hour ago as the priest read the words she'd been dreading for three days.

She was so beautiful, she'd always been beautiful, inside and out. I remembered the way she'd treated me from the very beginning. I'd always just been a family member with her, there was never any question of whether or not I belonged with the Swans, it was just a fact. Edward Masen was Renee and Charlie's son, and Bella's big brother…

"_Wow, your head's heavy, I like it. I didn't dream, not one bit. How cool is that? I can't remember the last time I didn't dream. Do you feel better? You didn't wake up again, and we were asleep for about twelve hours in the end. Did mommy make breakfast? I told you she would but I wasn't sure, I feel so energised, don't you feel energised?" She chirped down at me when we finally realised we were both awake, she didn't stop running her fingers through my hair and I wondered how long I could put off digging my nails into her skin whilst I purred._

"_Hello, I haven't seen you since that day at the home. You like to read don't you?" I asked as I turned my head to face her._

_She grinned down at me and removed her hands from my scalp, I scowled before plucking up the courage to unwind my arms from her waist and place her perfect delicate fingers back into my hair. She smiled and I wrapped my arms back around her and sighed in contentment._

"_Yes, I like to read. I talk too much but only to people I like, me and my dad get along really well but my mum always tries to get me to do girlie stuff or go to sleepovers. I'm like that Haley Joel Osment boy but I don't have a willie."_

_I snorted and grinned with my eyes closed, just drowning in the low almost husky quality of her voice, how is she only 9? She's so intelligent, and she sounds like an adult. She's supposed to be hyper active and annoying and oblivious, she's supposed to embarrass her mom by saying things like: 'but mommy, you said you hated the present' in front of her friends or wearing her high heels and using her lipstick. Instead she reads books and hugs people so they can sleep. She was right. We will be best friends._

_Every night for two weeks I woke screaming; "BELLA! WHERE'S BELLA?" and she would run in with a grin and say something silly like; "I'm right here waiting." And then she'd lie on my bed with my head on her stomach and whisper to me until I fell asleep._

_After the first fortnight I came downstairs after waking up without Bella wondering where the hell she'd gotten to and how I hadn't noticed, it was obvious I couldn't sleep without her so how did she leave me alone?_

"_No, daddy I just think it's silly, I go in there every night after approximately one hour and we hug then we sleep. I can't sleep until I get in there and he just wakes everyone up unnecessarily with his screaming. Gigantic wuss that he is." Ahh, she knew I was listening; I rubbed the back of my neck and entered the kitchen._

"_Mornin' Edward, Renee made pancakes so there's cereal in the cupboard." He winked at me over the rim of his coffee cup and I grinned at him, pouring myself some captain crunch._

"_Anyway bells, I'm not disagreeing with you, but I have concerns. You will only share the bed. Not the room, not since he's so much older than you. And you get changed in separate rooms. You literally share only the bed. Understand?"_

"_You got a boyfriend Bella?" I asked as my curiosity peaked and I wondered what the hell Charlie was thinking letting a nine year old have a boyfriend. _

"_No, we're getting a bed. Just a bed. Because it's silly we have to move around at night every day."_

"_Uh, what? I'm confused, so in my room or yours?"_

"_Yours is bigger, well, it isn't every room is the same, except yours has less stuff in, and we're going to convert the attic. It'll be our room, isn't that cool?" _

"_You serious? We're gonna have a bed to share in my room? I'm guaranteed no more nightmares?" She nodded. "You too Bella! We never have to have nightmares again."_

"_Well, the magic might run out." She mumbled, but she was grinning._

_I picked her up in a hug and asked Charlie when we were going bed shopping._

_Three days later me and Bella laid on the new bed in my room, it was a double, it had big fluffy down pillows and royal blue sheets. We went to bed extra early that night._

I pulled up to Charlie's house and lifted Bella into my arms, I took her to her bed and laid her down, she was awake, almost catatonic, but awake. I pulled off her shoes and took note of the déjà vu as I slid off her dress.

I placed a pair of pyjamas on the end of her bed and stepped out. I changed into a white tee and boxers; making her some warm milk and honey and wandering slowly back up to her room in case she needed more time. I heard her sobbing and pushed the door to her room open slowly, whispering her nickname quietly. "Teddy, don't cry sweetheart. I made you warm milk, the way you like it, with honey." She looked up at me from the bed and I registered how vulnerable and fragile she looked, the urge to pull her out of the bed and just kiss her into oblivion very nearly took over. I think I would've had I not been holding the milk.

She threw the covers from her body as I placed the milk on her bedside table. As I straightened up she launched herself at me, my young athletic body found no difficulty in catching her tiny feminine frame and I wrapped my arms around her middle as she encased me in her own body, hands where they belonged in my hair, legs around my waist and arms on my shoulders.

"What am I going to do?"

"Bella, stop talking like you're alone. I think it's pretty obvious I'm here. You are clinging to me teddy." She sniffled and loosened her grip but I placed my hands on her thighs and lifted her slightly off my tented boxers, squeezing my eyes closed hoping she wouldn't notice my erection.

"I'm going to be alone soon. You'll go back to New York, I'll have to sleep alone again, and there won't be anyone here. I'm so lost Edward!" she whispered in my ear.

"Teddy, you honestly think I'm leaving you here? You're my best friend – "

"Used to be."

I put her down on the bed and kept my hands on her waist, looking at her with a fierce expression. "Still are, always will be."

She blushed and I groaned inwardly, "you're coming to New York with me teddy. I kicked my old roommate out for you." I smiled as I lifted her face with one finger and wiped away her tears. "You wanna sleep now?"

"Am I really staying with you?"

"It's been arranged for months, you wanna go to college with me anyway right?" she nodded and started to smile. "Yeah you do. Now get in bed I'm fucking tired." She slapped me and tugged my hair. My punishment for the 'f' word. I crawled in behind her and she pulled my arms around her pressing her feet to my shins and resting her head on my hands as they pulled round her. I fell asleep almost instantly…

_I remember first being attracted to Bella like it was yesterday. It was her fifteenth birthday and she came running across the parking lot of Forks High and leapt into the Volvo._

"_Happy Birthday Tango! What're we doing?"_

_I laughed at her enthusiasm. She told me she hated her birthday, that people paid her attention but she felt it unnecessary, until we started sharing._

_In the beginning she'd celebrated her birthday and I'd waited 'til Charlie or Renee had the day off and we'd go for dinner or something. Since I'd turned ten birthdays had sort of haunted me. But one year Bella said she didn't want the attention and we should share. Since then we both looked forward to our birthdays and enjoyed them._

_I turned nineteen, and she turned fifteen._

_We spent the day together; we went to the movies, had dinner, went laser shooting and came home to the biggest cake I'd ever seen, shop-bought, obviously._

_As we settled into bed that night her familiar scent enveloped me; she'd started using strawberry shampoo and she was all strawberries and vanilla and something utterly Bella._

"_Love you tango."_

"_Love you teddy, happy birthday."_

"_Happy birthday." We still shared the blue bed, I still had nightmares if she stayed at Angela's and she couldn't sleep unless she was with me, on any odd occasion she could be persuaded to stay at Angela's she'd return home the next day and crawl straight into bed with me, allowing us a few hours sleep._

_Angela knew we shared a bed, as did Emmett. Nobody said a word; each of them had experienced what happened if we didn't share a bed. Emmett had woken to my screaming face and Angela had been given bruises from Bella's writhing and thrashing. Nobody questioned our motives; we were siblings, best friends, nothing more… until that moment._

_Her smell, it was incredible and as we lay together I pressed my nose to the tiny line of bare skin above her shorts. She was sound asleep and her fingers were playing in my hair as she slept. I watched her peaceful body as she laid there, her hair was curled and laid next to her, she was so beautiful. Her face was perfectly proportioned although her eyes were slightly too big, she had the puppy dog look down. Her body was lean and athletic without the curves, though they were beginning to fill out and I was becoming steadily more and more aware._

"_Stop staring at me and sleep tango."_

_Her voice made me sit straight up and she giggled, rolling over and laying with her back to me. Honestly, I had no idea what to do, she always slept on her back with my head on her stomach, when I hesitated she noticed._

"_Your head's getting heavier. You'll damage me if you keep doing that. Just hug me Masen."_

_I scowled, I hated when she called me by my last name, it only solidified the fact that I hadn't been with her family forever. The natural way. But now, my head argued a different side; _this isn't illegal if you're a Masen. Stop whining.

_Where did that come from? What wasn't illegal? I looked down at Bella and found the urge to slide her tank off her shoulders and kiss her collarbones was almost overpowering. Oh. That's what isn't illegal. I lay down and wrapped my arms around her, cursing my newfound attraction in my little sister. _And your newfound erection? _Shut up! _

_We'd given each other nicknames that first year as siblings, Teddy and Tango. For obvious reasons. Bella refused to accept the notion that I was either ginger or brunette, to her it was bronze or copper or some other cheap metal. Charming._

_I woke up the next morning after a long night of erotic dreams about my sibling and realised I needed to separate myself. Bella's voice drew me from my thoughts._

"_Uhh Tango, you're impaling me?"_

_Oh god I'd love to impale you. Okay that's it! I need to get away; I can't think things like that about Bella. They aren't right!_

_So after dinner that night I announced, I was going to apply for college and move out by the end of the month. That should sort my problem… right?_

_

* * *

_mmmm, Hornyward._  
_


	4. Lauren and Laurent

_Okay, I've started updating again, sorry guys life sort of caught up with me._

_My update on persistence was rubbish so this one is as long as i could physically stand before i got too excited and had to update. _

_Please Review._

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Chapter 4 - Lauren and Laurent.

**Bella Swan**

Sweat soaked my dress as I awoke to the monotonous bleeping of the seatbelt light in front of me. I slid the tiny pull- down desk away from in front of me as I sat up and yawned, pulling on my seatbelt and taking comfort in the click I knew increased my safety and placing my book back into my carry on bag. I was wearing a sweater dress, it was early September and my hair was down, I'd been too cold in Forks but I knew NY would be warmer.

I'd been staying with Sue for two weeks, my father's best friend 'til he died. She'd offered to give me a place until Edward's apartment was sorted out. I was supposed to be leaving Forks tomorrow.

But I couldn't stay another day. I'd told Sue that Edward was picking me up on the other side, but I couldn't get hold of him those hours ago, so I was just going to have to turn up one day early. I doubted he would mind.

As I got off the plane, hunched my shoulders, plugged my ipod back in and walked towards baggage claim I pulled the piece of paper from my bra.

Edward's perfect handwriting was blaring back at me, taunting me, screaming; _EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS MAN IS PERFECT!_

I ignored myself. Tugging the handle out on my suitcase, I wheeled it towards the huge glass doors on the other side of the airport. I could see them whilst I went through all the ridiculous procedures of an American airport – I mean, honestly, does it look like there's a bomb under this dress? – and jumped into the first free cab I encountered. I handed him the paper and smiled.

He grinned at me from under a big, brown, bushy moustache. I was reminded of Charlie. I didn't look at him again.

I thrust my hand, filled with notes, into his palm as I politely accepted my bags from him, murmuring; "thank you" before hesitantly approaching the skyscraper ahead of me. I walked around the revolving door and was met with a large black man displaying his full set of bright white teeth at me.

"Well hello Missy. What can I help you with?" I grinned back, coming across the first person so far on this trip that I felt like being genuinely friendly to. I glanced at his badge and replied;

"Hey Laurent. Is that how you say it?" He nodded and I continued "good, uhh, my name's Bella. I'm moving into this apartment, but I'm not supposed to be here until tomorrow. Am I okay to go up?"

He looked down at the paper, his grin still splitting his face and said "Bella! Of course! Mr Masen mentions you to every person with the time to listen sweetie." He winked at me and I ducked my head as heat filled my face.

"I'll carry your bags honey." He did, he carried them to the elevator, shouting at a redhead who was standing against a wall in a similar uniform to his and telling her to "Fill in for ten minutes."

He dropped my bags outside a huge oak-coloured door and I turned to him, reaching into my carry on for my wallet, he saw and shook his head, whistling as he walked away.

I knocked on the door and inhaled a large breath. Not three seconds later it was thrown open and I gasped at the woman facing me.

She had nothing on but a huge t-shirt, I had seen women in films who made this look sexy, their boy friend's clothes. She did not.

She had orange legs, with darker orange spots on the kneecaps and ankles. I snorted at her fake tan and looked back up taking in her white blonde hair and caramel coloured extensions._ If you're gonna borrow some other skank's hair at least match up your colours. _

Her face had makeup smudged down one side and her natural hair was messed up whereas the extensions hung straight down her chest.

_Honestly, Edward. A bit of taste?_

I opened and closed my mouth a couple times before she rolled her eyes and spoke: "Uhh, sorry kid. We don't buy cookies. I didn't get this figure buying overgrown girl scouts' cookies." I stood there looking at her, my mouth still open and my mind begging me not to laugh at this complete idiot in my brother's apartment.

The elevator dinged at the end of the hallway but my eyes were focused on my new best friend. She rolled her eyes at me, waved her hand two inches from my eyes and turned around, slamming the door in my face.

I backed up, my knees hit my suitcase and I folded easily so that I was sat on it on the other side of the hall from his apartment.

The person who got off the elevator was just to my left now and I looked down into my lap to avoid the embarrassment of someone finding me sitting on my luggage in an apartment block corridor like some kind of abandoned teen.

I got up before they got to me and knocked rapidly on his door again. It was wrenched open by the great orange commodity as she screeched out; "Now listen you little snoop I don't kn-"

"Why are you in my apartment? And why are you referring to my little sister as a 'snoop'?"

Both us females turned to face Edward, white button down, rolled up sleeves, tight black slacks and Italian dress shoes, laptop bag hanging from his shoulder and set of keys in hand as he stared back at the woman in front of me.

"Eddie…Honey, I was just trying to get this tiny cretin to stop selling me cookies so I could get back to warming up your bed."

"Edward." I whispered, he turned to me and his face lit up, I jumped him. Literally, jumped on him.

He caught me and I felt him slide his laptop slowly off his arm as he buried his face in my curls and whispered; "You're here, you're here early, you're finally here." He kept his arms around my tiny – because that was about the only thing the orange creation got right – frame and brought his head up when I heard him say the words;

"For christ's sake Lauren take my clothes off you cheap skank. You look like you cost 50 cents an hour. Have some self respect and go home. I thought I could trust you, leave the key on the doorside table on your way out." I nuzzled my face into his neck and felt my smile spread at the scent and feel of his big powerful body as he held onto me and kept talking into my ear. "Why are you early? I don't mind but I could have been here, waiting for you."

I didn't feel like explaining, instead I told him what I should have said when we were briefly together during the funeral. "I missed you so much Tango." He chuckled and gripped me tighter.

"Welcome home Teddy." We stayed like that in his corridor until I pushed my face away from him "Why are we still out here? I just sat on a plane for 7 hours Edward!"

"I'm waiting for Lauren to leave. She's uh, a piece of work."

"Yeah, I got that vibe."

When we'd watched Lauren do the walk of shame to her own apartment, which Edward informed me was just upstairs, we chuckled, he put me down and grabbed my bags as I walked into his apartment.

"Your room's down here sweetie." He started down a long corridor out of an open plan kitchen lounge. I stopped and bit my lip.

When he'd put my bags in my new room he wandered back towards me.

"What's wrong Bella?"

"Uhh, can I just borrow your bed? Only for now, I'm just tired and it's a new place and I want to get some rest and I think I'll sleep easier somewhere that smells like you." I blushed and looked at my hands, nervously wringing my fingers when I felt his arms wrap around me and his chin on my head.

"Teddy, you can sleep wherever you want." With that he picked me up in a piggy back to his front and carried me to his bed whilst I laid my head on his shoulder and shut my eyes, not even wrapping my arms around his neck, simply relaxing into him.

_Other brothers and sisters aren't like this with each other. Is this really normal? No? ahh he's not related to you though… so it's okay right?_

I turned off my head and relaxed as I felt Edward tuck me into his bed and sit up behind me. He pulled my head into his lap and began to pull my hair through his fingers. I hummed and smiled as I drifted to sleep.

_I'm home._

**Edward Masen**

Can I have her removed from the building for this?

I'm sure I can, although I did give her the key, with the hopes that she'd give it to Bella were she to come across her. She knew what Bella looked like, she'd seen the pictures, she'd asked if we were "romantically involved" and said that my grin gave me away.

And then she'd refused to let her into my apartment, because she was waiting for me, with her cheap extensions and bad tan.

The thought actually made me shudder.

I looked down at Bella's sleeping face, tangling my fingers in her hair and lightly stroking her scalp, she's so beautiful, her long eyelashes twitched as her eyes rolled around in her head and I hoped she was dreaming of me. Her hands came up and she nuzzled her face into my lap as her fingers locked themselves around my right thigh.

_I'm home._

* * *

_**Tom:** - Comes up behind DC and wraps his arms around her -** Tango, you're using our nicknames in your fanfic.  
DC:** - Leans backwards -** Mmm, I am aware of this, they're good nicknames Teddy.  
Tom:** - kissing DC's neck -** You could have asked, I might copyright those nicknames.  
DC: I'd still use them, then what?  
Tom:** - Whispers to DC - _

And then I had to leave. REVIEW.

PS. they'll keep the nicknames.


	5. Summer of '69

_Tom pretended to be a vampire the other day, so cute, and bought our tickets to new moon without me having to ask. I love him._

_I'm really feeling where I'm gonna take this story, and I'm a little lost on the others, so I might update this one more often._

_Hope you like this update. Review._

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Chapter 5 – Summer of '69

**Edward Masen**

Bella wandered out of my bedroom about six hours later, she didn't speak, she didn't look me in the eye and she wouldn't unclench her fists, she walked straight through the corridor and tried two doors before she came to the bathroom, going in and locking the door, the sound of the bolt sliding home rang loudly through the silent apartment.

I've been waiting for this since Renee died, she was supposed to go into shock then, she was supposed to block me out and pretend I didn't exist then, she was supposed to be over it by now. She went through a lot of shit back then, she did the whole - curl up in a ball for two weeks and cry, refuse to attend the funeral, end up arriving five minutes late anyway and then crying through the entire service - thing. But then she was over it, she was just herself, she'd cry every now and again but everyone was surprised at how okay she was. She said she just didn't think about it, ever, but I know her, I know it must've been eating away at her, and now that Charlie's gone, she's let go.

I carried on making breakfast, turning the sausages over on the griddle and waiting for the bacon to finish in the fryer. The eggs were in the oven keeping warm and the toast was buttered on the plate. I took the bacon out of the frying machine, spooned some eggs onto her plate and gave her two sausages as I heard the bolt undo and she entered again looking sheepish, worried.

"Morning Teddy, breakfast's here. I did a fry up; I know it's your favourite." I walked past her to the breakfast counter and placed the plates down before kissing her head and sitting her down, _stop kissing her whenever you can, just coz you like the feel of your lips on her silky skin doesn't mean she does. _I shook that thought from my head and squeezed her hand as I sat opposite her, sipping my juice and making discrete glances up at her.

"Thank you Tango, but if you keep looking at me like that I swear to God." She whispered and I didn't need her to finish her sentence, I knew how cruel she could be…

_I giggled and as I filled her conditioner bottle with the green dye I was thinking about how annoyed she was going to be at me when she realised, we were having dinner with the grandparents next week and by that time her hair would be luminescent lime according to the bottle, I was still grinning as I crept back into bed._

_I felt Bella yawn, scratch my scalp lightly and push my head off her stomach gently as she slipped out of bed, I grinned to myself and sat up, checking by rubbing my jaw to see if I needed to shave, I didn't think so. I left it and got out of bed, going to the kitchen and pouring myself a glass of orange juice. _

_I was chatting to Charlie when I heard it, the scream, and then the pattering of tiny annoyed feet running towards the kitchen._

"_Uhh, back in a minute" I said quickly, running towards the lounge and hiding behind the couch._

"_Where is he?! Where's that lanky ginger IDIOT?" Oh shit she called me ginger, she's REEEEALLY mad. I sniggered._

_I felt a horrible tugging pain in the back of my head and was jerked upwards to see a bright red Bella, topped with a mane of frizzy damp lime green hair. Huh. Does exactly what it says on the tin._

_I couldn't help it, I cracked up, I was literally rolling around on the floor laughing my head off. Until I heard her sobs, they sounded genuinely painful, like my laughter was piercing her soul. I scrambled up to her level, which actually only put me on my knees but still, I ran my hands through her now green bangs and pushed them away from her face. _

"_Hey, I'm sorry; I was just getting you back for telling Emmett my middle name. I love you, don't cry, it'll wash out. I'm so sorry. Please don't cry. Ahh Teddy you're killing me kid." I held her face to my neck as I kneeled next to her and couldn't help but think about how good she smelt._

_Eventually she sniffled and pulled away._

"_It's okay, I'll get you back." She said before she got up and left me knelt in the lounge on my own, really wanting to shout 'What? Get me back? When? How?'_

_Three weeks passed and nothing, she was fine, she didn't hit me, or ignore me or worst of all, sleep alone. She did nothing, I was starting to forget her promise, only her slightly green hair still reminded me. She'd begged Renee to dye it, but in fairness, it was hilarious, and Renee just said if she dyed it it'd be the wrong shade of brown and you can't wash permanent dye out. So she played the waiting game, and I grew more and more paranoid with each passing day._

_Another week went by and on a Thursday as I wandered through the cafeteria laughing with Emmett the large widescreen television used for special announcements started to flicker. Very rarely was it ever used, so everyone's attention was drawn to it._

_What happened next will haunt me forever. My hair was on the screen in what appeared to be a fog, but I knew that wallpaper, that was our bathroom and my hair was covered in shampoo… oh dear lord._

"_Got mah first real six string – YEEEEAH  
Bought it at a five and dime!  
Plaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayed it till mah Fingers BLED  
was the summer of '69!  
OHHHH yeah babehhh!"_

_I watched in horror as my filmed image flickered on the screen in front of me and turned, keening the words and faced the camera, eyes scrunched up in unadultered passion and fingers still scrubbing away. Kill me now._

_I turned and stormed out of the cafeteria, angrily strutting down the corridor until I was face-to-face with the soundproof visionary room near reception; I wrenched the door open and took in the scene in front of me. _

_Bella was sprawled out in her chair, laughing her head off and patting Eric Yorkie's shoulder as the video played right in my face, my showering self now into his fourth chorus of 'summer of '69'. I cleared my throat and watched Bella's face instantly lose all humour, she looked up at me, gulped and said; _

"_Give us a sec, Eric. Thanks again." The small acne-ridden boy leapt from his seat and scarpered._

"_What the fuck Bella?"_

"_Don't drop the F-bomb at me Masen!"_

"_Don't FUCKING call me Masen!"_

"_Why not, it's your name?!"_

"_Goddamn it you're so fucking stubborn!"_

"_Go ahead, say that word at me one more time, see if I can't think of something worse to do than this."_

"_You're such a prude, it's just a fucking word." She lunged for me, screaming like a banshee and brandishing her talons._

"_Don't you say those things to me, I'm not one of your skanks! I'm worth more than your bad language!" I had no idea what she was screeching about but still, we were arguing, I'm not gonna stop to ask._

"_Whatever Bella. This is crossing the goddamn line. You filmed me showering, you showed the entire student body!" I was gripping her wrists and my head was bent, we were nose to nose and panting, she looked fuckawesome._

"_I… I- uh, I doubt, uhm, everyone was in the cafeteria."_

"_Enough people were in the pissing cafeteria."_

"_Please stop swearing at me… I'm sorry, I am." She was whispering now and her eyes were closed, I was suddenly very aware of her eyelashes, their length, their dark colour, her rosy cheeks, her soft supple looking lips currently being punished by her perfectly straight pearly teeth._

_I sighed and yet again resisted the urge to just steal a kiss, just once, just to lean forward, press my own lips to hers, feel her gasp under my hands, wrap my arms around her and battle her tongue for dominance of her mouth God! It would be so easy._

_I released her wrists and watched as she appeared to deflate, releasing a deep breath and shuddering. I stalked out of the room and went straight to my car to rid myself of the erection now straining against my jeans._

**Bella Swan**

When I woke up alone I felt bitter, annoyed, angry at Edward.

I can't believe he left me here.

Left me. Like everyone else.

I didn't think I'd ever felt that alone.

I cried, for about an hour before I got up out of the bed and drifted through the house, figuring out which room was the bathroom by myself. At the sight of Edward in the kitchen I felt my fists tighten, they didn't release till I got to the bathroom.

Oh good. What a week to get the painters in, now I have to ask Doucheward for tampon money.

When I felt nice and calm I walked back out towards the breakfast bar, seeing a fry up I felt better instantly, he made my favourite. _Maybe he cares a little, now I feel bad._

He said something to me about making my favourite before kissing my forehead and squeezing my hands, I let my eyes close, basking in the scent of him. _Argh. Stupid good smelling hero man._

I heard my own voice as I told him to stop staring at me. I sound tired, I sound done.

I finished, washed my plate and quietly asked Edward to get me some tampax whenever he had a spare second. He nodded and said something insanely sweet like; "Of course honey, I'll go straight away" like he always does, and then I went back into the room I was in earlier. I was vaguely aware it was Edward's room, I didn't care, I snuggled up in his covers anyway.

Not twenty minutes later he came in, left the box of tampax on the nightstand, kissed my forehead, pushed my hair behind my ear and left again. I couldn't believe he'd gone.

I went through the rest of that day sleeping about six hours, eating, using the bathroom, thinking and sleeping again. Never did he join me.

Then the next time I woke up my right ear was burning, my fingers were tracing though soft, fine hair and I was face to face with a set of toned abs and a bellybutton. I looked up to see Edward's pouty lips, his hand resting in my hair and one arm behind his head.

He was astonishing. Literally the most beautiful creature I have ever seen, he never ceases to amaze me. His hair was crazy, all over his face and pillow, his eyes were slightly scrunched up and his fist was curling and uncurling in my hair, laid across his chest. One of my thighs was draping his legs and his penis stood to attention about four inches from my face. I'll admit I stared a little. You would've!!

And then I made my decision. He was my everything, the only thing I had left in the world. I was completely dependent on him, and when he became fed up of not being able to bring girls like Lauren back to the apartment, or having hair in the plughole, or buying tampax, I was stuck. I slipped out from under his hand and slid out of the bed, smiling slightly when he rolled towards me and reached out for me. I pushed a pillow into his grasp, he's so adorable.

I walked into the pitch black room at the other end of the corridor, pulled back the duvet and leapt into the bed, trying to stop my body from rejecting the cold sheets, and whimpered slightly when my overheated skin came into contact with the frigid fabric.

I won't lose him. I destroy everything I love, I don't know why but I obviously do. First my mom, then my dad, all my childhood pets.

I don't deserve to love anyone.

This is my punishment.

And I will accept it readily, just to keep him safe.

* * *

_Well, well, well. review. do it. right now. and you can put your face in Edward's happy trail whilst he's stood to attention for you. ooft. 'sif you wouldn't!_


	6. Issues

_Merry Christmas Guys and Dolls!_

_I know this one's a short one and I'm so sorry, It would've been longer but I doubt I'd have finished it before the new year and I just wanted to post before you all lost faith in me._

_It's all a bit hectic here atm, last week the ice put me in hospital and you may or may not know I'm writing my own novel - A REAL ONE! EEP. so that's at the forefront of my mind._

_This is a bit of a filler, if I'm fair, but I'll give y'all some issues and ALOT of updates to make up for it in 2010. Hope you enjoy._

_

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_

Chapter 6 – Issues.

**Bella Swan**

I grinned and pushed my nose further into the warm bare skin in front of me. I sniffed and basked in the scent of Edward Masen directly underneath my face. I was aware of his arm underneath my neck and his other hand underneath his own head, the steady rise and fall of his chest suggested to me that he was in fact still asleep. I sat up and looked down at him, turning my body so I was sat on my calves, knees pointed away from him, almost sat on top of his abs, hands on his chest.

He was beautiful. His face completely relaxed, tiny smile hinting at his lips, I ran my hand through his hair and watched as his slumbering self pushed his head towards my hand, the smile increasing, his face pushed up until his lips were placed against my wrist, they opened and he placed a hot wet kiss on my skin. I jerked my hand away and watched as his head fell back to its former location, still fast asleep.

My hands were resting on his chest again and I splayed my fingers out on his pecs, trailing the muscular definition and feeling only smooth skin. I watched his flesh give under my fingers and marvelled the slight pink of his nipples as he breathed steadily below me. When I felt my eyes continue down his body I became aware of his erection, once again proud and engorged beneath his boxers. The overwhelming urge to touch it almost claimed me and my hand drifted of its own accord to the fabric of his black boxers.

What happened next shocked me back to myself and the awareness that I was thinking about my pseudo-brother's body in an erotic way. I fluttered my fingertips over his hard penis and the tiny, soft movements caused his abs to twitch and his own fingers to curl into fists and clench the sheets.

I was suddenly hyperaware of his presence in a bed I entered very much alone. I wondered when he had snuck into the new room I occupied and how we'd become entangled without me waking. How long had he been in bed with me? And why couldn't he take the hint and leave me alone…

_I woke up with my fingers wrapped around Edward's hair for the sixth time in as many weeks, I softly scratched my fingernails along his scalp and felt him press his nose into the skin of my abdomen, a sleepy groan escaping his lips._

_I felt prickling heat roll down my spine and irritation washed over me, the urge to suddenly scream became intense and powerful and I removed my hands from his head, sliding out from underneath his mane of golden hair. Usually the sun licking its way gently through the tiny gap that always remained in the drapes would play with the array of colours surrounding his head and create an indescribable feeling in the pit of my belly. _

_Not this morning. No, today I wanted to rip it from his head strand by strand. _

_Tears were disguised by cold water in the bathroom whilst I stood beneath the spray beating down and punished myself with the frigid temperature. _

_When I entered the kitchen Edward was hunched over a bowl of cereal looking pretty dismal and my father was watching him like a hawk._

"_Good morning everyone." I said cheerily, hoping to mask the definite discomfort I felt this morning, the terrible crackly feeling in my spine and the need for destruction causing a trembling of adrenaline through my veins._

"_Morning." Came the muffled reply sandwiched between my dad's moustache and his mug though his eyes refused to be pried away from Edward's slouching form._

_Edward however, glanced up at me, and even my nine-year old childish self knew he was upset. More so than usual._

_I dragged him to one side as soon as we'd been left alone and began a whispered conversation, although my temper that morning may have influenced my tone._

"_What is the matter?"_

"_Hm? Uh, nothing."_

"_Liar. Tell me."_

"_There is nothing wrong Bella, drop it."_

"_Will not. You look like I just took your books away. Now tell."_

"_I… I'm scared." This was said in a voice so tiny and feeble I barely heard him, even huddled together the way we were. But I did hear it, and honestly? I was confused._

"_Well. Why?" I frowned at him but his answer came about thirty seconds later, I was growing exasperated, on the brink of interruption he spoke._

"_Because my usual trial period ends this week. I last about six week before the family decides they want a nice little girl with pigtails and no problems who hasn't seen two sets of parents fucking pop."_

"_Edward. Do not swear at me or I'll tell mummy."_

_I watched his lips twitch as he struggled to hold in the tiny smile I'd created and I continued._

"_What are you talking about?"_

"_Normally when I move in with a family, I start to count the days, weeks, y'know, to see how much sleep I'm getting. Only this time, I was sleeping, I didn't need to count, and it completely slipped my mind that after about five or six weeks the family feel like they've paid me my dues and they can move onto adopting some nice, untroubled little orphan girl."_

_I was completely lost, did he think he was going back there? With the rooms full of random groupings of children and the random wandering adults?_

"_Edward, you live here." I said, with the obvious simplicity only a child can portray._

"_Yeah. Until your parents realise what a screw up I am."_

"_I have said I will not take your swearing."_

_He grinned down at me and I felt my face betray me as he said: "Sorry Bella."_

"_You're staying here."_

_And then I walked off. End of subject._

**Edward Masen**

I wasn't letting her do this, I'd taken my Psychology GCSE, I knew what she was attempting.

She thinks she's the reason her family keep dying. Because she's ridiculous, compassionate, slightly melodramatic, gorgeous, witty, bright, entertaining, YOUR SISTER… YOUR SISTER!!

Ahem.

But like I said, I wasn't going to let her do this, so I slipped out of bed, padded across the apartment with my hand rubbing the length of my face and entered the other room down the hall.

"Edward, Tango! It's not… not fair. STOP. Please, please! Oh god." She mumbled as I watched her for an immeasurable amount of time and concentrated on the way her lips formed such simple words and then rebounded straight back into the adorable little pout she created in the throes of sleep.

"Hey kid. Let me in bed will ya?" I whispered directly in her ear, using circular breathing to inhale as much of her beautiful scent as I could whilst I was at it.

She grinned and rolled straight over, resting her hands on the tight space of skin above her shorts just past the area her shirt covered. Ohhhh Christ I wanted to lick her there.

As I snuck under the covers and tugged her towards me she hummed in delight and clasped her hands to my skin.

"I love you Bella." I whispered in to her hair.

Yes, she can push me away as much as she wants but I'll be there, at the sidelines, for when she needs me.

I pray to God that at some point, she'll need me.

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_Tom got me a diamond Necklace for christmas. Lovely boy._

_RE_

_VIEW (c:_


	7. Frantic

_This one's a little longer than usual._

_About a hundred of you have this story on alert. **SO REVIEW.**_

_**Fact #5?**  
the "AYGO by Toyota" Adverts scare the shit out of me._

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Chapter 7 – Frantic Distance.

**Edward Masen**

Wisps of light fizzled into my field of vision as I arched my back and sucked in a deep breath. The feminine tones and shades hiding the walls revealed that this wasn't my bedroom, the lack of warmth and space revealed that Bella was up and the lack of noise revealed…well, nothing.

I sat up, wiping a hand over my face and strained my ears in an effort to hear any sign of life inside my apartment. When none came I ventured out of the tepid room and went in search of my new roommate.

When I didn't find her I started to panic, she was in New York so she had no idea where she was going or how to get back. She couldn't have memorised the address yet so unless she took it on a piece of paper she couldn't have even asked someone. She had no cell and no way for me to contact her.

But she was sixteen, I was going to have to give her the benefit of the doubt… Slightly.

So I wandered the apartment, cataloguing her lack of use of the shower and noting her pyjamas in my makeshift laundry pile. She hadn't showered but _had_ changed. Her sneakers were gone but not her coat. I couldn't see her ipod anywhere, but the hair band that'd been sitting on the bedside cabinet was gone.

She'd gone for a run. She couldn't be gone that long just running right? So I took seat at my station on the couch, chewing the skin around my thumbnail and glaring little holes into the door.

Approx. 32 minutes and one bloody thumb later, I heard voices from the street. There were always voices, car horns, children, vendors etc. But of course; this voice made my ears twitch.

She was wearing a tiny t-shirt and shorts from what I could see, and talking to a man around her height, which was pathetic, she was tiny! She giggled and he grinned, reaching out to tickle her ribs.

She's been in the city five minutes…

I snarled at the window and slammed my fist against it before hurtling my frame towards the door and taking the stairs two at a time, the elevator not nearly fast enough. I realised too late that I was wearing nothing but boxers as I passed Mrs. Mulligan on the last few steps and she stopped to gape openly at me.

"G'morning Ma'am." I said hurriedly, not taking the time or manners to stop.

"It certainly is my dear." She murmured before tottering off in the way only an elderly lady can make elegant.

"Well, this was really fun, you brightened my day Izzy." Came a deep baritone from the lobby doors before I lurched one open and slipped outside, wrapping my arm around Bella and glaring at Midget McGee whilst I kissed her hair.

She was wearing the tiniest shorts and a t-shirt that could've outlined the veins in her torso, her hair thrown into a ponytail curling around her midback and her skin flushed.

If I wasn't still so worried I'd be seriously regretting my choice of attire.

"Teddy," I murmured, "I was so worried when I woke up and you weren't there this morning. Don't scare me like that." And I pulled away from my hug slightly to smile down at her but was met not with warm chocolaty eyes, no, I was met with a steely glare and a set jaw.

"Uhm, James, this is my roommate Edward. Edward this is James."She gestured towards him and myself in a tone that reverberated across the country and snapped at army majors' ankles before echoing in my head with the warning bells.

"Nice to meet you." I held my hand out and he took it, his fingers barely able to fit around my palm. I momentarily had a tiny image of him as that green toad thing in X-Men.

"So, I'll see you tomorrow Izzy?" He asked, looking back at Bella. She smiled and nodded.

"Bye James." She watched him jog away from us before turning on her heel and storming back into the building, leaving me stood in my underwear on a New York street corner.

I caught up with her and almost laughed at the comical accompaniment that is the slap of skin and squeak of sneaker on marble lobby floors. She appeared to be in her own world and whenever I spoke she scowled slightly.

"I really was worried."

"I'm sixteen."

"I woke up and you were gone."

"I went running."

"You know I don't like it when I wake up and you're gone." By this time we'd reached the apartment and I cringed when I saw my door still ajar and everything I owned on display.

"Why was he calling you Izzy?"

"Because I told him to."

"Bella," I placed my hands on her shoulders and she looked up at me with a blank expression "Teddy, seriously, what's going on, talk to me! You've been acting strange since you got here, I just… I want you to be happy with me."

"Happy with you?"

I faltered, had I said that?

"Uh, yeah… Happy here." Her face fell and I was intrigued for a split second before she spoke again.

"I went for a run Edward. Seriously I'm not a child. Or, for that matter, a stuffed toy, stop calling me teddy."

She walked off towards the bathroom and I straightened to my full height, dropping my shoulders and staring blankly at the wall in front of me. I was so confused, upset, confused, hurt and confused. I couldn't understand what was happening… Am I being Punk'd?

"I woke up and you were gone." I murmured.

"For Fuck's sake Edward! Yes! I was fucking gone, and if you ever got over your fucking ingrained abandonment problems and slept in your own bed you'd get used to the sensation of waking up on your own. Stop being so fucking creepy with me; stop sleeping in my bed; stop calling me stupid nicknames and _start_ getting over your fucked up issues!"

I stared at her, I didn't know what to say, she was changing before my very eyes. There were no words to express the terrible sensation in my chest, it felt like when you get a sheet of blue-tac and tear it. I didn't know this person. She wasn't the girl I loved.

The girl I love didn't swear; she grinned at me like I was the most important person she'd ever seen; she chattered away uncontrollably about mundane things that only she could make interesting; she was witty and quick and happy. This was not her.

I dropped my gaze to the floor as I constantly replayed those words.

_Stop being so fucking creepy with me. Stop sleeping in my bed, stop calling me stupid nicknames and _start_ getting over your fucked up issues!_

I stormed past her into my own bedroom, slamming the door behind me and sliding down the wall on the other side.

**Bella Swan**

Left, right, left, right, left. Pause.

Right, left, right, left, right. Pause.

What the fuck am I doing? I'm running…

_I ran as fast as I could, I needed to get away from there as fast as my tiny ten-year-old legs would carry me. The burning pain that throbbed and pierced my thighs was like salvation, I was so lost I didn't even know if I was in the same forest I'd entered._

_I didn't care._

_When my knees buckled I fell, pulled myself up on my elbows and ran again. I ran until my toes were sore, I was soaked in my own tears and sweat and my hair was loose from its ponytail. When I stopped I collapsed, crumpled in on myself, gave up. I don't know how long I was sat there. My feet were tucked underneath me and my hands covered my face._

_The sobbing was uncontrollable – I couldn't stop, there was nothing trying to stop me. My entire being and all forces of nature seemed to swirl around me and agree that I was permitted my gasping breaths._

_I'd never experienced or even heard of such an occurrence as I'd just been through. I didn't even know if it was wrong, I just knew I felt disgusted, that nothing could have prepared me, not ever, for what had just happened to me. _

_I counted the seconds. When I got to 5880 I encouraged my sore calves to propel my body into an upright posture and began my staggering exit of the freezing woods I'd seated myself in. My jeans were covered in foliage and my hands were gritty._

_I didn't care._

_I hung my head as I made my way to whatever light I could see up ahead of me, not bothering to wipe my face of the tears I had still running down them._

_My eyes burned, my temples throbbed and I had at least two blisters on my right foot._

_I didn't care._

"_BELLA?! BELLA!?" I choked back the next gasp I could feel and mentally wondered how I'd run for so long, and gone such a small distance._

"_BELLA!? Fuck." I smiled, my face was blotchy, I felt violently ill and I was incredibly disoriented._

_But that voice made me smile._

"_Edward Masen. I will tell mummy if I hear one more swear word." I whispered as I came to a clearing in the trees._

_I don't think he heard me, he didn't look up until I stepped on something that snapped._

_And then there he was, in my eye line, asking me frantic questions and worrying about me more than any other person ever had. My dad came in at a close second but at this moment in time, all I could think about was Edward, and that he was here. He'd found me, or I'd found him._

_He knelt in front of me and his long lean fingers reached out toward my face; he held it still as his eyes roved over every one of my features until he was searching my own eyes, his green ones were alive with adrenaline and what I always liked to imagine was love. I just stared right back._

"_Where the hell have you been!?" He yelled, directly in front of me, his wild hair was in reach and his body was longer than mine, we were the same height as he knelt._

_I'd had enough. I curled my hand into a fist and punched him as hard as I physically could. I wanted to hurt him for yelling at me whilst I was trying to think about how lovely he was, I wanted to hurt everybody for leaving me alone to escape that man, I wanted to throw myself to the ground and cry 'til it became a physical impossibility for me._

_I hit him until my shoulders joined the long list of my body parts protesting. Closely followed by my palms and fists._

_Somewhere along the line I realised I was screaming, yelling at him and crying into his chest while I thrashed around and tried to grasp my own situation._

"_Shh, shh, you're okay. I got you. I have you sweetie, I have you." He stroked my hair and squeezed me where he'd pulled me onto his lap. My two halves battled between themselves until the violent side gave out and I ravelled my arms around his neck and sobbed into his skin._

"_What happened? What happened, Bella? Please tell me?" I couldn't. And I wouldn't. I'd been digging my own grave with this entire scenario anyway; I'd caused such a fuss that I'd never thought of the idea that this entire debacle might simply be something ten-year-old girls all go through, and get over._

_I would get over it. I would not embarrass myself by creating a huge scene and not coping the way all the other girls do._

_But that doesn't mean I won't cry about it, and hug Edward and be comforted. Maybe I'm a freak, thinking what happened was wrong. I'm the only person so far to have made a big thing about it. _

"_Nothing, I just got lost and panicked."_

"_Fucking scared the life out of me. Swear to god Teddy, I thought I'd lost you. I can't do this without you." He whispered into my hair._

"Woah there Cutie. Almost knocked me flyin' over here, why the rush?" I looked up and attempted to focus in on the features of a man who wore the same essential running attire as I. He was short, ugly and actually not in my path, I wouldn't have run into him. _Idiot._ I shook my head.

"Uh, sorry, I was just, miles away. Hope I didn't hurt you?" After a brief assessment of the far too large grin on his face and the way he was slowly inching towards me, I decided he was fine. "Sorry again." I said, moving my hand towards my ipod headphone to reunite it with my ear. disappear once again into "the igloo" I use for when I want time alone and continue with my run.

"I'm James." He said, just before I could block out the slightly hacking property of his voice. I smiled and nodded, carrying on my hand's journey back to my left ear.

"So, are you new to the city? I don't recognise your accent." Hah, he was persistent. _That's a quality I love in creepy, strange men._

"Yeah. I need to uh…" I gestured in front of me and made to start running again.

"Ahh, cool I should be finishing up soon. I'll take a detour with ya! I didn't catch your name?"

_I didn't throw it at you._ "Ahem, sure. I'm uh… Izzy."

I paid little-to-no attention to whatever this guy was saying all the way back to the apartment building and didn't even realise Stumpz was attempting to flirt until he tickled me. In honesty I have no idea what we were talking about when he gave the signature "I'm-about-to-ask-you-out" line:

"Well, this was really fun, you brightened my day Izzy." I flinched and my insides itched every time he said my false-but-not-really name.

And then he saved me. Yet again. I was so grateful I could have cried the way I did six years ago. He slipped an arm around my waist and my vagina tingled in what should be an illegal way.

He was naked… Almost.

I longingly looked at his body, focusing on the boxers stretched over a, quite frankly, very impressive package. I snapped my gaze up to his and strained my jaw in an attempt to keep my focus on his face in front of the random short guy watching us.

"Teddy, I was so worried when I woke up and you weren't there this morning. Don't scare me like that." He murmured in a voice that leapt from his throat in the form of a tiny alien and yelled "I'M REALLY GOOD IN BED." My knees buckled a tiny bit. When I spoke my voice came out tight, low, strained and not half an ounce as sex-dripped as his had.

"Uhm, James, this is my roommate Edward. Edward, this is James."

"Nice to meet you." He gallantly offered his hand, though I could tell by his posture how uncomfortable and angry he was with me.

"So, I'll see you tomorrow Izzy?" I grimaced his way and nodded.

"Bye James."

I had to escape. Edward was livid with me. And I was in a lust cloud involving graphic images of his morning wood. When we got to the apartment I scrunched up my eyebrows and wondered why he'd been in such a rush that he'd leave the door open? I'd assumed he was fetching the mail and saw me or something – _did he come from up here?!_

We'd had a conversation on auto pilot all the way up here. It was something about him being worried, I'd replied shortly, becoming irate with him for interrupting my fantasies of his body. Then I remembered the promise to myself; I had to keep my plan up.

"Why was he calling you Izzy?" He randomly asked me, giving me the perfect opening.

"Because I told him to." I chose not to add that this was simply because I didn't want him knowing me well enough to be able to shout me on the street and have me actually turn to him.

"Bella, Teddy, seriously, what's going on, talk to me! You've been acting strange since you got here, I just… I want you to be happy with me." My ears pricked and my eyes found his, he wanted me with him? Happily?

"Happy with you?"

"Uh, yeah… Happy here." My face fell as disappointment washed over me once again, followed closely by anger. Anger was good – it was like fuel to the hurt I needed to throw his way.

"I went for a run Edward. Seriously I'm not a child. Or, for that matter, a stuffed toy, stop calling me teddy." _Please don't._

I walked towards the bathroom in aim of taking a shower and attempting to think of how to keep up this act.

"I woke up and you were gone." I heard quietly from behind me. _Don't do that Edward, I need to be angry for a little while longer, stop using our closeness to sabotage my perfect agenda. _

_This is for him, remember this is for his sake. _That became my new fuel.

"For Fuck's sake Edward! Yes! I was fucking gone, and if you ever got over your fucking ingrained abandonment problems and slept in your own bed you'd get used to the sensation of waking up on your own. Stop being so fucking creepy with me; stop sleeping in my bed; stop calling me stupid nicknames and _start_ getting over your fucked up issues!" The words scratched and damaged my throat as I tugged them out and lunged them at him. He stared in shock at me for a split second whilst I watched the hurt register in his mind, before he stalked past me and slammed his bedroom door.

I made it into the bathroom, removed my clothes, started the shower and loosened my hair.

Before I leant against the door and slid to the ground.

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_Yup. Issues._

_**REVIEW.** And donate to Haiti._

_Tiny rec: **The Daily Grind - letmesign**. Epic. Fantastic. Read it._


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